


I Built This Robot and All I Got Was a Matesprit

by shaqfu



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Fake/Pretend Relationship, I clearly know jack shit about robotics, M/M, Suits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-22
Updated: 2018-01-22
Packaged: 2019-03-07 22:22:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13444629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shaqfu/pseuds/shaqfu
Summary: Equius Zahak's work has finally been accepted into the robotics journal, Robotics Quarterly. There's really only one person who could be his plus one and his accidental fake matesprit, the one and only Sollux Captor





	I Built This Robot and All I Got Was a Matesprit

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Reedlet (isweartocoffee)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/isweartocoffee/gifts).



_Dear Mr. Equius Zahak,_

 

_After much review and consideration, your submission to_ Robotics Quarterly _has been approved. We invite you our dinner gala on March 3rd, at 7 o’clock that evening. The night will be filled with a meal and awards ceremony afterwards for participants of the journal. This will also be the day that the journal will be available to purchase and will be arriving in the mail. Extra copies will also be available to purchase at our gala. You are permitted to bring one guest and…_

 

Equius looked up from the letter to let out a sigh of relief. He took off his glasses and wiped the sweat off his brow while letting everything sink in. When he saw the letter in the mail, Equius could not help but assume the worst about his submission. He spent most of the past four years working on this AI. The only person who was there for him every step of the way, surprisingly, was Sollux. Sollux was the one who talked him into submitting his description and pitch, and later his paper, it was obvious that Sollux had to be his plus one, but Equius couldn’t help but think that the the plus one opportunity was usually for the partner of the author. Partner as in romantic partner. Of course, if Sollux’s name was on the paper, he would have gotten his own invitation, but that’s not the case. Maybe Equius could risk bringing Sollux as his partner as a thank you. I didn’t have to be a matesprit, right? It could totally just be a friend. 

 

Equius stopped himself from going down the thought-based rabbit hole. Gingerly, he placed the letter on the desk and grabbed his duct taped wrapped laptop and booted up Trollian.

 

centaursTesticle [CT] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

 

CT: D —> Sollu%, are you there

TA: ye2

CT: D --> E%cellent My Robotics Quarterly submission got approved and it will be in the March issue

TA: oh dude, that'2 excellent. congratulatiion2.

CT: D --> The issue is…

TA: ye2

CT: D --> I need a plus one

TA: oh

CT: D --> What I'm asking is

TA: 2piit iit out, zahak

CT: D --> Will you be my plus oen?

TA: oen

CT: D --> Shut your mouth

CT: D --> Please

TA: ii don't know

CT: D --> Please, you helped me when I had coding questions and were relatively decent to me when I was doubting myself

TA: ii ju2t diidn't want you two blow up the planet.

CT: D --> Ok, rude

CT: D --> Think of it as a thank you

 

Equius patiently waited for Sollux to answer. He gripped at the ends of his shorts, twisting them in nervousness. He was suddenly feeling really hot and really needed Sollux to answer him, or else he was going to start panicking.

 

TA: 2o ii can ju2t hang around and look pretty? or do ii get two network and 2ay ii 2aved your bulge 2everal tiime2 when you were about two have an horn 2pliittiing breakdown?

 

Equius let out a sigh in relief. He let go of hem of his shorts, and noted for once he didn’t rip a hole in them. At least that was one less thing he needed to worry about. He moved his hands back to the keyboard.

 

CT: D --> I particularly don't mind either one, but please don't make a f001 out of me

TA: yea, ok, cool, ii'll do iit.

CT: D --> Really

TA: really liike "you'll really do iit?" or really liike “really, ii’m suspiciious”?

CT: D --> Really, you'll do it?*

TA: ye2 ii'll do iit. 

TA: but you better look hot zahak, and ii'm talkiing fuckiing hot, becau2e ii am not goiing two look liike 2ome god whiile ii'm 2tandiing next two 2ome 2weatiing buffoon who can't dre22 hiim2elf becau2e he wa2 two bu2y 2weatiing and breakiing everythiing he touche2.

CT: D --> I promise, I'll try to 100k “hot"

TA: okay, cool

TA: Or as you would say, "c00l"

TA: when ii2 iit and what are my food optiion2?

 

———

 

Since Equius got the invitation, he spent the next fews months actively working on the final touches of his project. Many nights he stayed up, soldering circuit boards and wiring LED lights on the floor of his bedroom only in his boxers and binder, while he listened to calming music so he wouldn’t let the pressure get to him.

 

Some days, he sat down in a cafe, drinking glasses and glasses of milk while going over his reports and his papers, meticulously editing every page, paragraph, and sentence, attempting to make a well thought out and strong article. It was nice to know that his findings were going to get published but he also wanted it to be as close to perfect as he could. He wanted to impress those around him, not only the highbloods, but the trolls in his field that were the theoretical highbloods.

 

Even Sollux helped on occasion. He was always there on late nights when Equius could barely think and keep his eyes open. Always figuring out what needed to be added to the code and what bracket was misplaced in a second, while Equius could barely understand what was wrong. Sometimes, the best help he gave was telling Equius to just “go the fuck two 2leep, already.” It was these moments where Equius couldn’t help but think that Sollux was pretty damn great. Even if he was a little rude sometimes and condescending, Equius knew that he really didn’t mean it and couldn’t help himself sometimes. Equius was learning to take it with a grain of salt, and he was proud to say that he wasn’t getting upset over the things that people were saying to him as easily these days. However, now that Equius was learning to see past the bullshit of life, he realized something more terrible. This had nothing to do with his robotics project of course, but maybe this project did seal his fate.

 

He was falling in love with Sollux Captor.

 

———

 

“Damn Zahak, you do clean up nice. There’s not a speck of grease on you,” Sollux says as he looks Equius up and down, finally nodding in approval.

 

Equius willed himself not to feel self conscious. He was wearing a tuxedo that fit him perfectly. After some pleading with Kanaya and a promise to not to accidentally rip her work to shreds, Equius was set with a tuxedo for the gala. It was an incredibly dark shade of blue, so blue that it almost looked black, paired with a dark grey tie. Of course he almost strangled himself with his tie and had to watch a how to video maybe four times but at least he got it done without destroying the tie.

 

Equius had to admit that Sollux looked pretty nice too, even if he wasn’t going to say it. No tacky and overwhelming color block of red and blue was on the coder, just a classic black suit, with mustard colored socks and a lapel pin that looked like a honeycomb. It was personal, but professional.

 

“I’d appreciate it if you would not poke fun at me,” Equius said to his date.

 

“What else am I supposed to do this whole entire night, be nice to you?” Sollux asked as he brushed a strand of hair behind his ear. 

 

So that’s where the hideous red and blue motif was, hidden amongst several ear piercings. 

 

“Yes, be nice to me,” Equius says grimly. He was really hoping that he could get to the gala without sweating himself into misery, but if Sollux was going to keep acting like this, then there was no way he was going to be able to.

 

Sollux huffed, and took Equius by the hand and brought him into the gala. It was gorgeous, soft lighting all around, with people as formally dressed schmoozing to colleagues, discussing their most recent accomplishments.

 

Equius could feel himself beginning to sweat even harder. Was it suddenly hot in here or was Equius letting his anxiety get the best of him? He licked his lips and wiped his brow with a small towel. “I need a drink,” he bluntly says.

 

“I’ll go get us something, what do you want?” Sollux asks, patting him on the shoulder.

 

“Milk please,” Equius immediately requests. 

 

Sollux sighs and face palms. “I’ll let this slide, since it is your night, but please, learn to drink something else once in a while.”

 

Equius grins, but it sort of looks like a grimace more than anything, he had to relax or this stress would kill him. He slowly inched towards the crowd of people, reminding himself of how he should be networking with the rest of the community. Spotting a troll with short horns, sporting a green dress, he walked over to them and began to make small talk. After a few minutes of discussing the use of LED lights for cosmetic purposes, Sollux came up to Equius and the other troll.

 

“Ah you must be his partner, you make such a cute couple,” the troll says.

 

Equius immediately blushed, mouth opening about to say something, however, Sollux was too quick and rolled with what was just said. “Here’s your drink, honey,” he says, giving Equius his drink, and kissing him on the cheek.

 

“Sollux Captor,” he says turning to the troll, holding out his hand introducing himself. “Equius’ partner both in the romantic and business sense.” He smiles looking smug, while Equius stands stiff, slowly bringing the drink to his lips, trying to calm his nerves.

 

This, in theory was a dream come true, Sollux opening announcing himself as Equius’ partner. However, Equius was not in control of the situation and that was making him nervous, and his anxiety was beginning to mount, badly.

 

“I’m going to sit at the table,” Equius says to the two trolls and mechanically moves towards their assigned table. He forces himself to slowly sit down in the chair, instead of collapsing into it like he would at home. Desperately, Equius wishes this night would just be over. Everybody would already know he was in the journal, it’s already printed for nook’s sake. Nobody would even notice—

 

“Hey, you good?” Sollux asks as he places a hand on Equius’ shoulder.

 

“I didn’t mean for that to happen, they just jumped the gun,” Equius began to explain.

 

“You looked seriously freaked out, and I wanted to, you know, check on you,” Sollux said. If Equius wasn’t so wrapped up in his own issues, he would have noticed that Sollux was slightly blushing. “But listen, I don’t mind pretending to be your boyfriend for this kind of thing, just give me more of a warning next time?” 

 

Equius coughed, composing himself. “I most certainly will try to give you warning for next time, if there ever is one.”

 

Sollux smiled, which made Equius feel a little light headed in a different way that his anxiety made him feel moments ago.

 

“Come on, let’s make you some good contacts so I don’t have to coddle your ass all the time,” Sollux encourages, pulling him up by the hand. Together, they walked out to where all of the waiters were walking around with plates of mini food, and scientists and engineers conversed with each other easily.

 

“Oh sweet, horse devours,” Sollux says, picking up a miniature quiche and popping it into his mouth without taking a napkin.

 

Equius was shocked by Sollux’s behavior. “Please, do not call the hors d’oeuvres, ‘horse devours,’ I’m trying to be professional,” Equius pleads.

 

“Eh, whatever you say, darling,” Sollux says, leaning in to kiss him on the cheek, quiche crumbs and all.

 

———

 

Equius, frankly couldn’t believe how well his luck was going. Sollux has been saving his rumpus all night, helping him break the ice so he felt less awkward talking to people, making sure that he wouldn’t break anything whenever he got nervous, and so on and so forth. They were finally sitting at the tables, chatting with their acquaintances at their table. As soon as they sat, Equius reached for Sollux’s hand half as an anchor, half to keep up appearances, and wholly because he wanted to know how far he could push this. This wasn't the first time Equius wished he could hold Sollux’s hand without reason.

 

After some eating, the lights dimmed down and a burgundy-blooded woman walked on stage. Her long horns curved back and had the same shape of her slicked back hair. She wore a tuxedo with her sign stitched into her lapel. She was a very sharp professional looking woman, in Equius’ opinion.

 

The troll walked towards the microphone and greeted and thanked everybody at the gala tonight. She began to talk about her personal experience with _Robotics Quarterly_ and finally moved on to the awards. After a few winded speechless about the necessity of robotics in the modern world, the suited troll began to speak again.

 

“The Newcomer Award is for somebody who has just recently entered the field and is publishing for the first time, not only in _Robotics Quarterly_ , but somebody who is being published for the first time overall. This person exemplifies what it is like to be a bright, young mind in the field and _Robotics Quarterly_ cannot wait to see what he will bring to the robotics world in the future. Without further ado, Equius Zahak, will you please come up here and accept the award you so rightfully deserve?”

 

There was clapping all around him, and the trolls at his table all began to congratulate him. Equius felt a pair of hands on his face, it was Sollux pulling Equius’ face forward to make eye contact. It felt incredibly slow, but Equius knew that it was happening quickly: Sollux moved his face towards Equius’ and kissed him on the lips. It was just a pull of the bottom lip once and a quick peck on the lips. Equius blushed furiously, but it gave him the strength to get up and accept the award.

 

Quickly, he walked onto the stage and gingerly took his award, praying he wouldn’t break the small statue in his hand.

 

“I wasn’t expecting this,” he begins as the crowd quieted down. “It means a lot to me that you would award this for me.” He dabbed at the small amount of sweat that was on his brow with his towel. Once he did that, it was like all of his fear had vanished; he suddenly knew everything he was going to say was going to be the perfect.

 

“I know this is just the beginning, but I hope to become an inspiration to other trans engineers, and with this award, this proves that I am going in the right step. I’d like to thank _Robotics Quarterly_ , and thank my partner, Sollux Captor for all of the emotional support, as well as coding help when my brain was utterly useless. Thank you all so much.” As soon as he said his last words, Equius nodded towards the suited troll and quickly walked back towards his table. 

 

“You didn’t have to thank me,” Sollux says to him as Equius sits down, lacing their hands together again.

 

“I wanted to,” Equius said.

 

“You didn’t have to call me your partner either. People are really going to think we’re matesprits.”

 

“I want you to be.”

 

Sollux nodded, letting Equius’ words sink in too. 

 

“Yea, I’d like that too.” Sollux says with a smile.

**Author's Note:**

> this took me so long to write but it was so fun to write!!! thanks so much to Reed for bringing me this prompt and I love writing for him! I haven't written homestuck fic since...oh boy 2012? either way, it's been a blast! 
> 
> [twitter](http://www.twitter.com/@vicunad) | [tumblr](http://www.countvonroo.tumblr.com)


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